Any form of suffering can be released in the here and now, regardless of external circumstance
Because you are Creator, and because your natural state is freedom, anything that appears to be other than that is within your command to change.
At first it is easy to assume that we would want to create a life of pure happiness, ease, pleasure and comfort. To think this way is to deny the value of difficult experiences and feeling states. Of course I would never wish pain or struggle upon anyone, yet it exists for everyone and to deny that fact approaches the land of spiritual bypassing.
If pain and suffering is real and universal, instead of trying to fight it or deny it, how can we better understand it? What is the point of pain? If we can open our hearts and minds to it, we can at least limit our resistance to it so that it can serve the purpose it is meant to serve.
Challenging experiences serve the purpose of developing wisdom and giving you the chance to experience growth within your creation. It is much like a ceramicist and their clay. Difficulty is the hand that shape your soul. These experiences give you the opportunity to arise above and ascend in the way only you can. They give you the opportunity to decide who you are and what matters to you from the very depths of your being.
Be the Main Character
I’ll invite you to think about the character development in a book or show. Those defining pain points are what bring a character depth and relatability. A character that only has it easy as they walk through their life would seem shallow and empty, no matter how pleasant it appears to be on the surface. It is through those pain points, and in particular how the character responds to them, that we truly get a sense of who that character is. It is that depth that allows us to connect and relate.
Therefore, if you are someone who has an extensive history of traumatic experiences, you can choose to see that as your opportunity to be the most interesting character in your story. The stories of redemption, personal evolution and growth tend to be inspiring and uplifting. Plants that never get stretched by wind lack the strength and sturdiness of stalk of their wind-touched counterparts.
As we look at life in this way, we can start to see the distinction between pain/discomfort and the extra layers of suffering that are so often piled on top of it. Through the stories we tell about pain, we can turn a paper cut into a debilitating nightmare or an amputated leg into a funny story. This is the nature of being creative. Reality is responding to how you think about it.
We won’t ever permanently escape pain or discomfort, but we have total control over how we perceive it. Pain is pain. Pain is only suffering if there’s a particular kind of story told about it. The degree of the suffering depends on how much energy is given to the story. If we can accept the pain and discomfort for what it is without excessive storytelling, the suffering cannot exist. This is true of physical, emotional or any form of pain.
Suffering is a form of resistance that attempts to delay or avoid pain. We tell these stories and believe them to be real because it slows or blocks the feeling of pain. Ironically, the unconscious delaying or avoiding of pain so often makes it worse in the long run. Instead of just feeling the pain and allowing it to move through so it can be done, there is a holding onto the pain for later. That holding uses up a lot of energy and if done long enough can manifest as disease.
Remember that these low level parts of your brain are focused on what they believe to be life-threatening. It is attempting to protect you from what they believe to be dangerous, not what actually is. The protection mechanism makes its calculations based on your past experiences, which may or may not be relevant anymore as you are growing and changing all the time and so are the environments around you.
The role of your higher functioning brain is to work with this more animalistic side to refine its senses. If the lower levels are driving your mind to tell a story about how dangerous it is to be rejected by a social acquaintance, it is up to the higher levels to come in and see if that is indeed a valid threat. Obviously your life is (not usually) in immediate danger from social rejection. But, maybe the lower levels are onto something and there is some adjustment in behavior required to be in alignment with your long term goals. The higher and lower levels enter into a respectful conversation of validating the fears, and then consciously choosing how to respond (or not respond) to the concerns that your lower levels are raising.
As more of these conversations are held between the higher and lower levels, they become more in sync, opening up communication pathways and reducing the frequency of inner conflict. They get to know and trust each other, ultimately becoming married to one another. Both sides become so trustworthy that they merge into one unit, creating a feeling of integration within. You are not overly spiritual and not overly worldly, but instead exist in that center point singularity of ultimate creative potential and power, able to walk grounded in the world as a fully awakened spiritual being. There are fewer and fewer conversations within yourself and just the emanation of your unique essence.
What often happens instead of the inner conversations is one-sided stories told by the mind to avoid the tension of pain. Stories run and then decisions are made, actions taken from this place of fear without any real resolution. We rush to make decisions, take action, run away or shut down (fight, flight or freeze) because it provides some temporary relief or distraction from the pain. But since the pain wasn’t fully released, it will inevitably come back in one form or another.
Being aware of the conflict and consciously choosing to put it aside for now is a separate thing. Sometimes the realities of life such as previous commitments, energetic availability, environmental appropriateness, etc. may get in the way of a total release. When you choose to put the issue aside, you do so with the intent of coming back to it later. There’s no deluding yourself into thinking it's done. It’s done when it’s done. Conscious suppression is an important tool. It's the unconscious avoidance or premature action/expression that we are looking to grow beyond.
At any point, with no need for a reason, the stories that create suffering can simply be dropped, revealing the true issues associated with the pain. As the painful part completes its process, it will ultimately run out, leaving space and new levels of knowing in its wake. Waves of Truth are flowing in with all its gravity and beautiful hope.Those waves bring spacious freedom to be even more honest with yourself, discovering more about who you are and what you love. Clarity of being more connected to your true nature. The freedom to move and make decisions without the burden of suffering.
For more personalized and specific help with bringing more freedom into your life, I make myself available for one-on-one sessions for just that purpose. Go to trueyoumindbody.com/book-online to book one now. Remote and in person options available.